Ephesians 5:21 Submitting to one another in the fear of Christ.

Submit yourselves to one another because of your reverence for Christ.

This is a passage of Scripture that we struggle with, for various reasons.  For some it seems oppressive, re-enforcing an intolerable and cruel regime, or calling us back to the dark ages, before the idea of human rights was developed. For others it's too easy, reinforcing our stereotypes.  For some of us it may seem irrelevant: if you're unattached, parentless and don't have a job, what does teaching about marriage, parents and masters have to say to you?

Well, let's start at the beginning.  Let's remember that Paul says "Submit yourselves to one another because of your reverence for Christ."  The scope of this for believers is pretty well universal.  Husbands, wives, kids, parents, slaves, masters, pastors church members: Traveling apostles (or the BU of Scotland) and local church, teachers and prophets, worship band and congregation, team leaders and team members...  "Submit yourselves to one another out of reverence for Christ."  It's relevant to all of us.

Please note that Paul actually says "Submitting to one another." It is in fact a continuation of Paul's description of what flows from being filled with the Spirit: Speaking in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs; rejoicing; making melody in your hearts to the Lord; submitting to one another... It's part of the "Spirit-filled life", part of the overflow into a joyful, abandoned, praising life: the very next thing Paul thinks of is "Submitting to one another.  There is a theological content to this.  Submission is not only an outworking of the renewing work of the Holy Spirit in you life; it is also the outworking of other spiritual truths...


Out of reverence to Christ. Literally "in the fear of Christ".  It is because we live in a reverent fear, an attitude of the utmost respect, that we submit to one another.  In fact when Paul gets into the specifics, the "household Code" of practical instructions, each one is rooted in truths about God and our relationship with Him: thus...
1. Wives, submit to your husbands as you do to Christ...
2. Woven into the teaching about husbands and wives is teaching about Jesus and the Church. Paul says the Church is the bride Jesus loves and for whom he sacrificed himself and died.  Marriage, from the very earliest days of human life, is and has always been a picture of the love Christ has for his Church. Even before Jesus died for the Church, the union of a man and a woman has existed as the picture of the relationship between Jesus and the Church.
3. Children, obey your parents in the Lord.   The command to obey one's parents is the only one of the ten that has a promise attached.
4. Slaves, respect your masters. It's Christ you're serving.   Masters, in the way you treat your slaves, remember that you and they both serve one master, Christ.

So this is not just a matter of pragmatism, doing what works; it is not juts something that exists so certain people has to obey certain other people; it is not just a way of having a harmonious church or family life.  Submitting to one another has its roots in the work of the Spirit, and in our relationship with God who is father, Son and Holy Spirit.

The rest of the submission passage - with its teaching on husband-wife, child-parent and master-slave relationships, is the outworking of this single sentence: "Be subject to one another in the fear of Christ."  ... In every case there is a two-way traffic. It is not about maintaining the dominance of husbands, fathers and masters.  Submission is meant to be mutual.  It's about relationships.  You're not living in obedience to God's word is all you do is turn these verses into a set of rules and regulations. They are about bringing some structure into the relationships we build with one another.  All Paul says in verse 22 through to chapter 6 v 9, is an outworking of verse 21: Submitting to one another...  Whatever relationships we are in - and in some of them there may be a clear about who is responsible for what - the starting point is the same: Be subject to one another.

And submission is a radical matter. There is a weak-strong dynamic in each of the practical examples Paul gives.  Paul in fact challenges the way society thinks.

About Gender
Remember Paul lived in a society that was strongly male-dominated and sexist.  The Roman Empire tolerated the abandoning of baby girls: one Roman citizen working away from home wrote to his wife: "I am still in Alexandria. ... I beg and plead with you to take care of our little child, and as soon as we receive wages, I will send them to you. In the meantime, if (good fortune to you!) you give birth, if it is a boy, let it live; if it is a girl, expose it." (In other words, put it outside, either to die of cold or starvation, or be raised to be a slave in someone else's household.)  And in that male dominated society, Paul not only tells the woman to work out her submission to Jesus in her relationship with her husband; he also tells the Husband to submit to his wife - in the sense that he is to love her with the same kind of love that Christ showed for the Church when he died on the Cross.  Guys, if your wife has problems submitting to you, it's either because you have problems leading, or you have problems loving. Try making a sacrifice, giving something up, and see what happens!

About generation and seniority
Children, obey your parents. Parents, do not exasperate your children. The word "children" refers to relationship rather than age, but you can narrow down the age range of the people Paul is talking to here.  They are old enough to know that they are  "in the Lord" but young enough to be still receiving education and having their minds formed by their fathers.  In the Roman world, it was a father's job to teach his children the basic life skills including reading, writing and using weapons.   The idea of children having any rights at all is a comparatively recent one.  Paul busts the generation barrier by addressing children and fathers, and giving them each responsibility for working out what it means to be a disciple. It works both ways and Paul radicalises the parent-child relationship, not by taking away the structure of submission but by giving both parent and child responsibilities.

About financial behaviour.
Slaves, obey your masters as you would obey the Lord. And masters, do not be harsh with your slaves because they are your Christian brothers.  What Paul says about the relationship between a slave and a master - and in particular the fact that they both serve the same master, really lit the blue touch paper under the institution of slavery.  Yes, - despite the natural injustice of one human being becoming the property of another - Paul doesn't say as Charles Finney did that Christians should not have slaves.  But what he said totally subverted and radicalised the way a Christian thought about slavery so it would never be the same again.

In each case the STRONG - the husbands, the fathers and the slave-owners - have a responsibility to care for the weak.

And in each case, being the WEAKER party does not take away your responsibility. Wives, children, and slaves are to submit to their husbands, parents and masters.

None of that means that we should tolerate injustice. We should speak up for justice; we should defend human rights and engage in politics.  But we do so with respect for the person on the other side of the dispute.  Whether you're a worker, a Council tenant or a benefit claimant, whether you're the boss, the official or the First Minister, you need to treat the person on the other side of the counter with dignity and respect.  That's the radicalism of Paul and Jesus; the upside-down Kingdom that is prepared to be different to the way the world is.

© Gilmour Lilly July 2011