Eventually, Abraham experiences a tragedy – and this time he is not offered a choice. His beautiful Sarah dies. No-one can deny the sense of loss Abraham experienced at this point. Despite the sadness, worry, confusion and shock he had felt at different stages in his life, Abraham's grief was so overwhelming that the writer actually mentions (for the first time) that Abraham wept. (v. 2) He mourned – meaning eh wailed and beat his breast, and shed tears. And only those who have experienced something like it can understand that loss.
Loss is part of our experience, whether we choose it or not. And we experience loss in different ways –
- the loss of a loved one as we walk through the valley of the shadow of death
- ageing or life changing illness with the loss of health, |mobility, independence;
- loss of employment, of prospects and prosperity
- family break-up
- we lose a vision or a dream we have cherished.
- the death of traditional elements in our culture, so we lose familiar landmarks and the Church loses status and influence in society
- change in our churches that feels like loss.
Bereavement changes our lives. Those who have been through bereavement experiences will agree with that. You experience the loss of a loved one. Life changes – and as it does the sense of loss continues.
Change and loss are closely intertwined. Loss is change. Change – even positive change – involves loss. Choice involves saying “No!” so one thing in order to say “Yes” to another. The traditional marriage service includes the line “forsaking all others...” Coming to Rosyth Baptist Church means not going to that other church down the road.
So, for Abraham, there is a sense of loss. His only choice is what this change will do to his life: will he block it out and live in denial? Will he allow it to dominate his thinking and ultimately destroy him? Or will he face it, be reconciled to it, and begin to hope again.
“Change marches onward – may all change be blessed” so says Henry Twells in his old hymn, "Awake, O Lord, as in the time of old!" But not all change is welcome. How can we ensure change is blessed?
Hope
Sarah's death had brought something home to him sharply: where would he bury
 |
| Sunset on Castleland HIll, July 2014 by G Lilly |
So Abraham went to the Hittites who lived in the land. He took a bag of silver with him; it was now or never. Time to do a deal.
What we have in the rest of the chapter is a description of a polite, formal discussion, a negotiation that ends up with Abraham being given the right to own land, and buying a field that included a convenient cave, from one of the Hittites called Ephron.
Buying the cave was not just about honouring the past: it was about having a stake in the land. For the first time, Abraham actually owned a little piece of the promised land! It wasn't much, but it was a start. One scholar calls it a “prophetic sign” of what God was going to do in Abraham's family, of the inevitable journey from being a tribe to being a nation. Abraham would be buried in that cave (Chapter 25 9). So would Isaac (35. 27ff), Rebecca and Leah (49. 31); and Jacob (carried all the way from Egypt, see 50. 13); And even Joseph: Exodus 13. 19 tells us that although Joseph was buried in Egypt, when Israel left Egypt, they took Joseph’s bones with them – for forty years in the desert – so they could be buried in Canaan. It's all a way of saying “We are expecting God to give us this land. It is our land.” They were “looking for a country of their own” (Heb 11. 14). but they were also “longing for a better country – a heavenly one.” (Heb 11. 16) We need to live hopefully – for God's kingdom “on earth as it is in heaven;” and for heaven itself. And “hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.” Romans 5. 5
So how do we move towards hope?
Firstly, stand up. Abraham “rose from beside his dead wife” (NIV) or “left the place where his wife's body was lying”. Literally “he stood up from the face of his dead.” We need to consciously decide we are going to stand up. Our loss is staring us in the face. We feel wrecked. We've cried, we've shouted, we've thrown things. I was reading in the Gideon news about a guy called Steve Woodcock who's now a Pastor but who describes when he came back to God: “I had a little Gideon testament (which had survived remarkably well having been flung at walls) and began to it”. And some of us can relate to that. We've told ourselves all hope is gone. But we reach a point when – the the face of our loss – we stand up.
Secondly, be real. Abraham admitted the weakness of his position. “Here I am, grieving the loss of Sarah, and I am a foreigner and stranger among you.” There's an urgency about this. In the Middle East, burials have to take place within 24 hours of death. And there's a long term necessity about getting it sorted. And as they speak, Abraham is in the embarrassing position of not owning property nor having the right to do so.
Thirdly, press in. Abraham avoided distraction. The Hittites responded by saying “No, Abraham, you're like a prince among us. None will refuse his tomb for you to bury Sarah.” It's very polite, very respectful; in fact, it's almost flattering. And it's clever: they are actually sidestepping the issue: “Abraham, you're a great man – a prince among us, we know your people are god's people. So you can use any burial cave you want – pick the best you can find. But it won't actually change hands.” It would have been easy to think “That sounds reasonable. They recognise that I am a powerful, rich man....” But it's not good enough. Don't be distracted by what sounds reasonable; don't be distracted by flattering words. When Peter healed the beggar at the beautiful gate of the Temple, there were plenty of distractions – a crowd walking by, and some of them may have given the man money – but Peter and John said “Look at us!”. Don’t be distracted by money or TV of career or reputation. Don't be distracted by anything.
Fourthly, pay the price. When Abraham made the deal with Ephron, the land he bought was probably overpriced, but Abraham didn't haggle about the price. He paid the four hundred shekels of silver straight away. The point is not that “Nothing is too much to spend on my Sarah!” (although I suspect that the funeral industry exploits that sort of sentiment) but “No price is too high for the future God has called me to be part of.” Can we say that? “No price is too high for the future God has called me to be part of.”
Finally
We have to ask the same questions, face the same choices Abraham faced. Do we live in denial, or face reality? Do we allow reality to crush us, or do we learn to hope. We can't choose to opt out. But we can choose how we respond....
- Face it.
- Honour the past.
- Embrace the future.
- Live hopefully.
No comments:
Post a Comment